A Man

I was fortunate to meet a man today who happened to be Italian (my heritage)–a man who was passionate when he spoke of life, his family, the love of his life (his wife), his home country and his singing.

We talked about how today is so much about “now” and “right away” and “disposable.” People can be wadded up and tossed out with Tuesday’s trash when they appear “unexciting,” “respect” is somewhat of a lost art form that many people vaguely remember and, in all of the busyness, rushing and noise, we can miss out on some simple pleasures and passions.

So a garage sale turned into a serendipitous moment filled with warmth and light. “It’s about this,” he said tapping his chest where his heart was. Yes, it is.

Love vs. Abandonment

Life has been interesting of late. Translation:  not much blogging. Fingers crossed, prayers said, waiting and hoping for good news next week regarding a person I love dearly. Grateful the test went smoothly.

In the meantime, I was thinking about a word that is probably one of my most hated— “abandonment.” After dealing with this “word/issue” in my own life and seeing it recently playing out in the lives of people I care about, it became forefront and center. I don’t believe anyone—regardless of gender—ever wants to feel abandoned.

We don’t want to wake up one day and find that our spouses have left. We don’t want to discover that our best friends ditched us. We don’t want our boyfriends or girlfriends to just move on and “forget” to tell us. 

As humanity, we have a universal need to be loved and to feel secure in that loving. To know that despite our shortcomings and idiosyncrasies, we are worthy of unconditional love (I’m not talking about remaining in an abusive relationship—physical and/or emotional).

With love, there’s trust—not blind trust if someone has betrayed and hurt us—but trust that is a safety net. Trust that is reminiscent of the sun—it rises in the morning to brighten our day and sets in the evening. It is dependable, reliable. Even when nighttime comes, we are not left completely in the dark—we have the gift of the moon and the stars.

How many of us know what it feels like to be loved unconditionally? Love that doesn’t have to be romantic, although it can be wonderful. It could be love between best friends, love between a child and parent or even the love for a community who acts like family to us.

 I am grateful to have many people who do love me. I have felt the aftereffects of abandonment—deep hurts that have scarred over yet serve as reminders. While not desirable, they are mine. They are beautiful in a marring sense—they remind me that I have felt pain, loneliness, sadness yet here I am today—alive and more grateful for those who do love me.

So for any of you dealing with abandonment, it hurts—badly. I am sorry for what you are going through (M and J). I think of you every day and feel it, too, knowing what you’re dealing with. It won’t matter much to hear it now, but you’ll make it through today, then tomorrow, then another day and pretty soon a week has gone by. A month, a year and, at some point, it won’t hurt as much. In the meantime, I love you and you’re not alone.

~Pamela

Why? Because.

“There is much asked and only so much I think I can or should answer, and so, in this post I would like to give a few thoughts on what seemed to be the overwhelming question: “WHY?”
And here is the best answer I can give: Because.
Because sometimes, life is damned unfair.
Because sometimes, we lose people we love and it hurts deeply.
Because sometimes, as the writer, you have to put your characters in harm’s way and be willing to go there if it is the right thing for your book, even if it grieves you to do it.
Because sometimes there aren’t really answers to our questions except for what we discover, the meaning we assign them over time.
Because acceptance is yet another of life’s “here’s a side of hurt” lessons and it is never truly acceptance unless it has cost us something to arrive there.
Why, you ask? Because, I answer.
Inadequate yet true.”
~Libba Bray

Sailing

The sooner we learn to be jointly responsible, the easier the sailing will be.
~Ella Maillart

My uncle loves to sail. He is a highly intelligent man and knowledgeable in many subjects including art (he is an artist), philosophy, literature, technology, writing, and, yes, the thorn in my side, computers. Sailing appears to be one of the most freeing experiences one can encounter in life. To be out on the water sounds incredible and calming and exhilarating (especially to someone who has no sea legs and turns a ghastly shade of green).

Since most objects or experiences can be life metaphors, sailing is no different. While feelings of bliss and joy come from feeling the sea beneath us (so I’ve heard) or looking out over the vast expanse of sparkling waters on a clear day, a dark side of nature exists. Seasoned sailors are aware of this reality. They are prepared and ready to battle it, if necessary, in order to survive. This knowledge is in the forefront of their minds at all times.

How similar is life with sunny days cast suddenly into shadow or unexpected summer storms that arrive with fury. We don’t have to be sailors to respect nature and life. We can live knowing, that at any moment, we might have to fight to survive, that the feelings of bliss we are encountering, at the moment, might end, that we have to be in the now, in the present, to taste life, breathe it in, let it fill our senses, to appreciate it. We try to not let the storms take away our sunlight. We get our life legs under us and stand, sometimes, kneel, and, other times, fall.

Yet, we keep on and, in the keeping on, learn what we must, that which comes from not giving up easily, refusing not to deceive ourselves, being honest, knowing that, in some aspects of our lives, we steer our own ships, saying “I’m sorry” when we mess up, forgiving, having awareness of ourselves and others, appreciating the azure skies (however fleeting) and even the billowing thunderheads that remind us that life is change, and that we bring about positive or negative effects depending on our actions, words, and life views.

(Uncle, if you’re reading this, I hope one day to sail with you. It  doesn’t have to be a long trip. I’d be thrilled to make it a short time without feeling sick. In that moment, I hope to experience the feelings of freedom and peace and exhilaration you encounter out on the water.) 

Friday Moment

{this moment} – A Friday ritual. Photos – no words – capturing moments from the week. Simple, special, extraordinary moments. Moments you want to pause, savour and remember. “This Moment” is a ritual found on  SouleMama’s blog then grabbed by the Wee Man which was lifted from Almost there by Sarah-Jane and snagged from Alejandro.

This is a Friday moment + vision boarding combo post. I want to thank Linda Lee from Dangerous Linda for her friendship and inspiration. Because of her, I had a great moment this week that involved, scissors, glue, contemplation, lots of magazines, and dreams. If you haven’t checked out her blog, head on over! Have a great weekend.

Friday Moment

{this moment} – A Friday ritual. Photos – no words – capturing moments from the week. Simple, special, extraordinary moments. Moments you want to pause, savour and remember. “This Moment” is a ritual found on  SouleMama’s blog then grabbed by the Wee Man which was lifted from Almost there by Sarah-Jane and snagged from Alejandro.

It’s been a while since I’ve participated in this lovely tradition but I’m happy to be with you this week. Life has been “interesting” as of late and, yet, I find myself thankful for all that is good in my life and the people who glisten and sparkle in it.

My BFF, all the way back from when we were “cool” middle schoolers, surprised me with this beautiful angel sent with love from Canada. She had no idea of the recent events in my life but she “believes” in me and was prompted to send it. She was not aware my tiny Christmas tree is adorned with angels (go figure). Isn’t that how best friends grace us? On a mystic level? Have a blessed holiday season and remember who and what makes it special. . .

You Tube Tuesday

You Tube Tuesday, adopted from Josh at Its Tiger Time, is a day set aside for sharing your favorite video.  Feel free to join in each week and see how creative we bloggers can be.  Each month, Josh will highlight a selected video and present the winner with the ‘You Tube Tuesday Award.
If you participate, remember to leave your You Tube Tuesday link at Its Tiger Time as well as all the blogs you visit.
(Sorry for the late post, Josh!)