You Tube Tuesday

You Tube Tuesday, adopted from Josh at Its Tiger Time, is a day set aside for sharing your favorite video.  Feel free to join in each week and see how creative we bloggers can be.  Each month, Josh will highlight a selected video and present the winner with the ‘You Tube Tuesday‘ Award.

If you participate, remember to leave your You Tube Tuesday link at Its Tiger Time as well as all the blogs you visit.

The Difference Between Men and Women

“W” is for Wedgie!

According to my darling nephew, the letter “w” is for wedgie. No watermelon, wiggles or Wednesday–just wedgies. There is no designated time for “w’s” to occur. They may happen unannounced on any day of the week and wherever young exuberant boys are present. This is not to say that my niece–and other girls–do not participate in giving “w’s.” They just lack the bountiful zeal their male counterparts express when giving them. I don’t have to worry, though. The little munchkins don’t scare me. I just have to watch my back a little more .

Top O’ the Morn

Top o’ the morn (afternoon) to you! Although I am mostly Italian, the leprechauns visit us nearly every year. We forget to leave something green for them the night before and they punish our negligence by wreaking a wee bit of havoc. TPing our Christmas palms out front, strewing undergarments about, turning chairs upside down, leaving cabinet doors open, and, yes, even green pee in the toilet. A note usually accompanies the madness. This morning, however, was different from other St. Patty Day’s. My coffee pot was MIA along with my favorite mug. The little stinkers! I finally found my necessary items of addiction and was able to percolate a good, strong brew. Whether you are Irish or not, may you enjoy the mischievous teeny ones today and try to avoid their wiles!

 

May the road rise up to meet you. May the wind always be at your back. May the sun shine warm upon your face, and rains fall soft upon your fields. And until we meet again, May God hold you in the palm of His hand.

~Irish Blessing

 

B.S. Meter

Meter reader guy:  “I inspected your service line and nothing’s been tampered with.”

Me:   “Thank God, I was worried for a minute.”

Meter reader guy:  “I went ahead with the maintenance and you should be good to go.”

Me:  “What do I owe you?”

Meter reader guy:  “Nothing.  Says here you’ve paid in full.”

Me:  “Awesome!”

I am happy to announce (no, not that, what the heck were you thinking?) that my B.S. meter is fully operational.  It is so sensitive that it picks up the slightest B.S. kilowatt.  Then the small hand moves.  Fortunately, I am not charged for B.S. read.  I’d be in a hell of a lot of trouble.  However, I am developing a portable, handheld system that may be purchased for a reasonable price for those of you whose meters are not working properly.  I have many people to thank for my highly, specialized meter but I will reserve my accolades for another time and place (the B.S. Oscars 2011).  In the mean time, you know who you are.  I do, however, have my speech worked out.

Me (accepting my award):  “Thank-you.  I am so honored.  I would like to thank my family and friends for supporting me during times of high stress  B.S.  Next, I thank those red hands for spinning out of control and saving me from unnecessary naivety. I will treasure you always.  For those of you who have fine tuned my meter because of the spoonfuls truckloads of B.S. you have dumped my way, my future appreciates it (bowing)!”

This Friday Moment

this moment} – A Friday ritual. A single photo – no words – capturing a moment from the week. A simple, special, extraordinary moment.

A moment you want to pause, savor and remember.

“This Moment” is a ritual I found on Life inspired by the Wee Man adopted from SouleMama.
Here’s my moment-

Be sure to leave a link to your moment below in the comment section!

Humor Me Monday

Wow! A post on Monday the intended day!  Fabulous!

• My niece and nephew were spending the night over the weekend.  My nephew wanted to sleep in my son’s room (my children were time-sharing with their dad) and my niece was thrilled to sleep in my daughter’s room.  They both ran into the bedrooms.  Nothing but silence from my daughter’s room as my niece headed straight to the dollhouse.  Suddenly, I heard “booooooooooo” streaming from my son’s room.  I walked in and my nephew was lying on his back on the floor staring at my son’s bulletin board.  I glanced over and saw the large, signed poster of the Florida Panther’s ice dancers (with their exposed abs, short shorts, and laser whitened teeth).  “Do you want me to take that down for you?” I asked.  The kid is only 7 yrs. old!  “Yes!”  he replied with another long “booooooo.”  I promptly removed the push pins and placed it out of sight.  The sweet innocence and wit of little ones!

Humor Me Monday

I decided to enact a weekly blog ritual of posting something funny a family member says (will most likely be the kids). Fortunately, I get to see my niece and nephew quite a bit during the school year (and they’re little) so there’s boundless material to swipe from them.  My children can be very witty but, because I am dealing with a teen and a tween, I have to be sensitive as to what I post.  Therefore, I will clear it with them before I blog about anything that comes out of their mouths.  Occasionally, the grown-ups crack me up so I’m including them when applicable (seniors have years of life experience and I’m happily shocked by some of their words).  Mondays are usually a drab day hence the necessary “Humor Me.”

This past week, a few cute incidents occurred involving my niece and nephew.  Aside from the Jedi training questions from a couple blogs ago (which were quite serious you know), others things made me laugh (or suppress laughs):

• Christmas Eve, my nephew and I were discussing elves at the dinner table.  I told David and Emmie how I asked Santa (every year from the time I was a kid) for an elf.  The elf conversation quickly changed to a discussion about boyfriends and girlfriends (don’t ask how). My niece blurted out, “But I already know who I’m going to marry, Aaron!”  I explained to her that it was sweet since he was a nice boy (they’re in kindergarten) but she’d have to date him when she was old enough (college age, ha-ha). Then, I told her how she’d need to see if he treats her well like opening the car door for her, calls her when he says he will, makes sure he is kind, caring, and doesn’t tell lies etc.

Suddenly, my nephew turned to me and said, “Auntie, you can’t have a leprechaun for a boyfriend because they’re sneaky and they steal!”

“What?” I asked trying not to laugh.  He smirked at me and repeated his statement.  I assured him I would not and he seemed relieved.  Lol.

• (Christmas evening.  My niece looked exhausted.  My mom asked her if she slept Christmas Eve.)

“Not at all,” Emmie replied.  “I heard Santa open the front door at midnight.  Then he put the magic, yellow dust on me and it makes me dizzy.  Then it stops and I still remember.”

“Remember what?” I asked.

“You know Auntie.  That I saw him.”

“He probably needs to use more dust for you then,” I said.

“Yeah, I guess so.  That’s why I’m so tired.  The dust didn’t work. I was up all night!”

(If you could have seen her convincing, little face and gestures as she explained it, even better.)

• It took my nephew a few years to figure out (and he still doesn’t get the concept of divorce, thank-God) who my ex-husband is.   He was so little at the time he has no recollection of “C.”  He does, however, remember my former boyfriend (same first initial, a man unlike my ex) and every time he’d look at the map near the kitchen table, he’d point to a particular country and say, “Auntie, look there’s your husband.”  He finally realized (after numerous explanations) that I was not married to my boyfriend and that his cousins’ dad is a different man with three, other little children of his own.  Whew.

Life is never dull with little ones around and they are a continuous stream of humor.  I’m so grateful to be an auntie and a mom!  Till next Monday. . .