Meter reader guy: “I inspected your service line and nothing’s been tampered with.”
Me: “Thank God, I was worried for a minute.”
Meter reader guy: “I went ahead with the maintenance and you should be good to go.”
Me: “What do I owe you?”
Meter reader guy: “Nothing. Says here you’ve paid in full.”
Me: “Awesome!”
I am happy to announce (no, not that, what the heck were you thinking?) that my B.S. meter is fully operational. It is so sensitive that it picks up the slightest B.S. kilowatt. Then the small hand moves. Fortunately, I am not charged for B.S. read. I’d be in a hell of a lot of trouble. However, I am developing a portable, handheld system that may be purchased for a reasonable price for those of you whose meters are not working properly. I have many people to thank for my highly, specialized meter but I will reserve my accolades for another time and place (the B.S. Oscars 2011). In the mean time, you know who you are. I do, however, have my speech worked out.
Me (accepting my award): “Thank-you. I am so honored. I would like to thank my family and friends for supporting me during times of high stress B.S. Next, I thank those red hands for spinning out of control and saving me from unnecessary naivety. I will treasure you always. For those of you who have fine tuned my meter because of the spoonfuls truckloads of B.S. you have dumped my way, my future appreciates it (bowing)!”
When will you be handing these out? Lots of bs going around the last few months? HURRY!!!!
Unfortunately, they are still works in progress! Love you.
LOL. I was too busy trying to keep my old rickety BS meter com exploding to come read this sooner. I look forward to the release of your new and improved version.
Haha, I will send you the hand held model when it is completed
I use mine nearly daily. Today, an exceptional amount. Comes in very handy 
How did you know what I was thinking? It’s not like it was the cable guy or something… *cue Big Lebowski line*
BS meters are in short supply, because there’s always a run on them. A hand-held model would be very handy! (God, sorry for that pun).
How much are they?
Ha-ha
You’re a poet!!!!!!! I’m working out the details. . .will keep you posted. Want you to be able to order one late at night during an infomercial with the ability to get it in your home for a free trial! 
You talking to me?? haha
Cheers A
Why no, should I be?
LOL…;D
I think you could sell a million of them. This is hilarious.
http://timkeen40.wordpress.com
Think Trump would back it? Lol.
You got my vote red hands DOWN!
LOL! thanks hon!
ROFLMAO! This is just what I need around here! Then instead of telling people to ‘talk to the hand’, I could just show them the meter! Too funny:)
Awh, Mary but it’s true! Glad you liked it! Life is too stressful and we need to laugh!!!!! I must get working on this hand held meter right after this book is written
lolol Great stuff really made me smile.. I started following you.. Always use a good laugh!!! I try and add a little humor to my postings.. sometime people don’t seem to pick up on it lol
http://jpweddingphotograpy.blogspot.com/2011/02/free-your-mind-and-rest-will-follow-and.html
I’m happy you liked it
Cool, thanks! I will check out your site again! Thanks for dropping over!
Fortunately your meter does not come marked with M.S. or PhD. More of the same or whatever and Piled higher and deeper.
LOL, nope I wish it did though! Sometime my meter will be marked M.S.!!!!
I think as a worldly woman as well as a wordy woman, your BS meter is awesome – now if only I could get mine to function. When my boss tells me its doing my career good – somehow it seems to go on the bleep………..
Hmmm. . . you might be in the market for my new product then
if your bs meter is working well, i’d recommend going to http://www.tbaoo.com – it’s full of it
Ha-ha, there is a difference between bs and wit. . .your site is full of wit as far as I’m concerned
Its always handy to have, find mine effected by alcohol and lack of sleep. Which is usualy when i need it most.
Lol, hmmm. . .while I can’t relate I’m sure alcohol could impede the effectiveness of the meter. As to the sleep, no matter how tired I am mine functions perfectly
LMAO loving this post…. I’d vote for you
thats not B.S.
Jessica
awh, thank Jessica
ha-ha!!!